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Monday, August 29, 2016

Growing a New Spine

When I moved to Vancouver, I elected to work with a shamanic woman who I believed could help me heal from the religious dogma inflicted upon me since birth. After about a year or so of visits, she told me she had discovered — she could see — I had begun to grow a new spine. She consulted with one of her master students, who confirmed what the healer saw. The spine looked to her like “a twig with some new green growth appearing along my old spine. The old spine was disintegrating.”
 
I was curious. Apparently out of my “stump,” emerged some new growth, a baby tree had come forth. The tribunal of elders who judged me could not — ever — destroy my faith. I was going to be okay. I was healing because perhaps I believed in myself enough.
 
On the one hand, I was skeptical. On the other hand I was hopeful.

I couldn't argue with my body, it is true. The pain in my body is gone, curiously. I now stand straight and tall. I have a coat that tells the story. I used to wear the same coat as a member of the family religion, where the belt used to tie just under my chest. The belt is now situated in a new area of my coat. The belt now sits four inches lower. My chest has opened up. I stand upright now, and the belt now sits at my waist. My waist is now separated from my chest by a bodice.
 
I now thank the tribunal of elders for giving me the boot. “Kicking me out” was just what I needed to get away from the family religion and become self-directed and independent — get on with my life. And the coat tells the whole story. Is it a miracle? Some might think so. I say, "maybe, but not necessarily." It still leaves me with a curious question: "Why is my health improving... now that I am disfellowshipped?"
 
I am grateful that I can trust myself — finally. I can believe in myself. My own life experiences have demonstrated to me that I am able to heal when I let go of rules and dogma that no longer serve my best interests.

 


 

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